I have found the perfect boy. Someone who i have so much in common with, is gorgeous, funny, nice, just argh i can’t even. I wouldn’t even fuck them because they’re too great to be just a one-night thing. And the best thing? I don’t even feel the need to be with him, or even be weird about anything, i just look foward to getting home from school and knowing we’ll be talking until the next morning. So much happy. So much content. What a great person. wow.
+last night at a party i was fairly drunk, i went behind the bar to talk on the phone so my friend could hear me, while around there a boy came up to me to see what i was doing, he saw my cuts on my arm because my sleeve had ridden up, he looked my in the eyes said he was sorry and he hopes i get through whatever i’m going through. He then kissed my wrist, kissed my cheek, smiled and walked away. I was touched.
+things i wanna say to people but i can’t.
Person 1: You’ve killed me and i hate it, but i don’t hate you. You made me happy then took it all away. Our relationship was bullshit and so is your life. I wish i knew how pathetic and what a piece of shit you were before i considered dating you. But i feel bad saying that because i miss you, every day and night. I wish you could see it from my view. I’m broken and torn and depressed. You came. I had happiness in my life. You pissed on that happiness while your tongue was in another girls mouth. Why can’t i bring myself to hate you is beyond me when it’s all i wanna do.
Person 2: i can’t even. You’ll always be my first love. There’s always ganna be a place in my heart for you. And i’m okay with that. And i still see something when i look into your eyes, and it’s not a love or attraction feeling, or a i miss you. Because i know it’s none of those. But it’s a feeling of some sort. And i think that if we started off now and not when we were young, it would have worked. But shit happens and immaturity got the best of us back then. Some of my greatest but worst memories are from you. And alot of lessons i’ve learnt from some of those.
person 3: We will never be how we were and i think that’s why we don’t try. But if you ever left this world i would be so broken i would be lost, and i know that promise we made, i’d follow with it because i’d feel so lost. I hope you know who you are. I love you too death, we went through something together and it made a connection that will never be broken. I’ll always care and always be here. You’re so much greater than your thoughts trust me beautiful.
Person 4: I’m sorry i crushed you i’m sorry i hurt you i’m sorry i cheated i’m sorry i lied but i’m not sorry for leaving you. It wasn’t you it was me. Honestly. I started getting depressed and cutting myself and you couldn’t handle seeing me like that and i couldn’t handle hurting you with it and other things. You’re one of the greatest people i have ever known and we had a huge connection. We’re better off without each other.
Person 5: i love you. i swear to god i love you. you’re the person who always has too put up with my shit. I’m self centered, I’m a bitch i’m bossy i’m closed off with my emotions and i can’t react to any. And i don’t tell you how much i appriciate you because that’s just something i can’t express. You’re beautiful you’re funny you’re so much like me. You’re greater than what you think your imperfections are. I care for you, even though i put off this whole ‘i don’t care about anything’ thing. I do, i care so much. It just comes down to my problem that i can’t express or show emotions no matter how hard i try. You’re so perfect. You’re honestly like my soul mate or something i’m not even kidding. Never give in, never give up. I love you.
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